Calen's 5th Birthday

You guys. My biggest baby boy is five. FIVE. That means it's not even acceptable to call him a preschooler anymore (though I guess since he's actually in preschool maybe it's okay for another couple months? Maybe?). Although I hate seeing my littles grow up, I can tell "five" is going to be a fun year. He's more interested in conversations, asks funny questions, tells even funnier stories and is so incredibly helpful. I guess I'll let him grow up a little. I guess.

His actual birthday was on Thursday so we did what we usually do on his birthday. We started the day with birthday pancakes (the only day a year where whipped cream, sprinkles and fire are allowed on the pancake. It's also the only day a year where Mommy singing before 8am is permitted):

Ready to blow out his candle!

 After school, we drove up to his restaurant of choice for an early dinner. He wanted "a 'rester-naut' that has food and a place to play", so we went to Chick Fil A, the closest restaurant with a play area. After some good play time, we continued the tradition of going to Toys R Us to let him pick out anything he wanted (limited 3 items per customer). He chose Hot Wheels tracks, a Hot Wheels cargo truck and some Star Wars podracers. 

Unlike other years where he grabs the first thing he can find and refuses to get any other item, he very meticulously walked through the store with his hands folded behind his back, going "hmmmm", putting things in the cart, then pulling them out and trading them for "better" items. It was very thoughtful and adorable.

Also Mommy and Daddy bought him a new bike because he looks like a clown on his current one, and a skateboard, because one ER visit this month hasn't been enough.

Today (Saturday) was his party. Surprise surprise he requested a Hot Wheels party and a #5 cars Cake. Luckily, Pinterest is amazing and some crazy person actually made a #5 cars cake and posted step by step directions so that I didn't have to figure it out all by myself. Also Walmart sells premade black fondant which meant I didn't have to do anything regarding fondant except pull it out of the box. Cheating is lovely.

Since I'm not in the least a fan of creating, setting up and coaching birthday party games, I decided not to this year. And Calen didn't ask. And since it was a hot wheels party, it was as simple as bringing out all his hot wheels tracks and putting them in various "stations" around the house, then putting a basket of cars out and letting the kids go at it. It seemed to be a big hit. 

Tracks EVERYWHERE

Party favors: Cups and a matchbox car. Done and done. Also, princess cups for the girls, because who wants yucky boys stuff anyways

And that was that. Friends, cars, pizza, cake, presents. A simple party that didn't leave for want. After the party, he built some new Lego sets, sat (literally) on ALL of his new cars so that Camden wouldn't touch them, and played his brand new Disney Infinity. 

And I'm still in denial that he's Five.

Happy birthday Calen.

Boogers.

The other day, I noticed something on the wall in the upstairs hallway. It was brownish and smeared like a finger dipped in paint. "is that blood?!" I asked myself, wondering who had killed what recently? And why was there evidence smeared on the wall? What is this, Murder, She Wrote?

Detective Brad said "I think I've seen this before, look in here..." and led me to Calen's room, and pointed to his bed. There, on the wall, above his headboard, was the most gruesome crime scene I had ever seen:

genocide

It was enough dried on booger smears to make my eyes twitch and dinner to start coming back up. I stared at Calen mouth agape.

Who smears boogers on the wall??
Why would you think smearing is even almost okay?
How long have those been there and I haven't even noticed??? Because that's seriously like a years worth of boogers on that wall. 

So we had an impromptu family meeting about boogers and if you have one, put it on a Kleenex, for the love of God, and put the Kleenex in the trash. Immediately. And those that smear boogers on the wall must live outside in the trees with orangutans. 

I'm not quite sure there is anything more disgusting on this planet than a human boy. 

The amazing thing is, I discussed this with my next door neighbor at the bus stop the next morning. She said her daughter did the same thing at the same age!! What is this phenomenon?! Where did it come from? And why? Whyyy.

So, if you have children from the ages of 4-5, check the walls around their bed. There may be boogers. Lots of them. In various shapes and colors. Take all necessary precautions.

This has been a Public Service Announcement.  

How to React to Life (When You're Five)

So I know it's been a long and I mean a LONG time since I last wrote, and I'd love to say something poetic like I have been tremendously busy climbing Mount Everest, or hunting jaguars, or homeschooling, but the truth is, the reason I haven't blogged in so long is because 1) I was on vacation in Washington, and then afterwards 2), we bought a dining set at Costco, which we can't put together yet because we haven't sold our old table, so it's been sitting in it's big ass boxes in the dining room. And thus blockading my laptop and I haven't bothered to climb over the boxes to access until now. 

What an adventurous life I live. 

First of all, big changes in our life. We received moving orders from the Coast Guard, and we will be relocating HERE:

So the initial reaction was "blegh". Southern California is not really my forte in terms of living full time. And it's a massive city, and still farther away from home than we wanted, and I hate palm trees. I mean I really HATE palm trees. I don't know why. They bother the shit out of me. Also, Brad is going back on a 378 foot cutter, which means back to the old 3 months home, 3 months deployed bullshit.

But then I got to thinking about one thing: 365 days of sunny, 70 degrees and a light breeze. Oh.Em.Gee. Which actually entails to 365 days of things to do OUTSIDE. And sooo many things to do. And also, taco trucks. So now I'm excited. 

Fine print: We do not have a move date yet, but assume June. We do not know where we are living yet either, but trying for Murphy Canyon Navy housing in Northeast San Diego. 

We waited until this past weekend to explain to Calen that we were moving. I was concerned that he would be upset about leaving the only house he really remembers. We planned out what we would say, bought books, mentally prepared etc. So we sat him down and explained to him that we are moving into a new house far away, and that a moving truck is going to come and take all our furniture and his toys etc and drive it to our new house, and he'll be able to play outside a lot and make new friends and and and. This is what my almost five year old got out of it:

 
Aaaand that was pretty much it. We played the "review" game with him to see if he actually "gets it" (ask him what exactly is going to happen? Where are we going? etc). And he gets it. "we're moving to a new house far away AND A MOVING TRUCK IS COMING." Whatever. At least there were no tears and he's so excited that that moving truck is coming. 

More serious discussions hit us three days later as the family lost Brad's grandpa on Sunday, the family patriarch. Since Brad is planning on flying back for the service, we were forced to explain to Calen what happened. He's never really dealt with a family death before. So we explained that great Papa got really old and really sick and died, and he went to Heaven to live with Jesus. We braced ourselves for impact, and again, his reaction:

 Life is so simple when you are five. 

We played the "review" game again. "Great papa got sick and died and went to Heaven with Jesus and Daddy is going to help Grammy and Papa be sad. So do you want to play the game now?"

Accurate.

Fine print. We are so very sad to say goodbye to Grandpa Hansen. We was a giant among men, and the world is a lesser place without him in it. That said, we are so relieved that he is at peace. Rest in peace Leonard Hansen. 3.10.14