Evolution

Let's set the record straight right away by saying that I don't believe in evolution. 


Wait, that's not entirely true. I believe in some evolution. Not the evolution of man, but the evolution for man. VHS to Blu Ray. Fig leaf loincloths to jeans. Harvesting eggs out of your chicken coop to shoving women out of the way in the dairy aisle to get the last carton of non-broken jumbo eggs. See, evolution. I believe in it. 

I also believe in de-evolution. Butter to margarine. Windows XP to Vista. Swords to guns. (Hey, COME ON. Swords are so much cooler than guns. How could we ruin warfare by introducing guns?). 

See, evolution. So I don't believe in it but I do believe in it. Just not in the context that everyone assumes I believe in. 

Where was I?

According to some so called brains that wrote lots of books on their theories of evolution, man used to be monkeys. Then the monkeys learned to walk on two feet and then they were man but we still eat bananas like monkeys.

That's the abridged version. Why do people waste their time taking four years of college and reading all these boring books about it? I just nailed down the entire theory of evolution in two sentences. Monkeys. Man. Bananas. Simple.

(I still don't believe in it) 

Camden passed the evolutionary test (yesterday). He started walking. On two feet. 

And not like taking one or two wobbly steps and then plopping down and giving up. Like purposefully marching all the way across the room, from one person to the next, squealing with joy of his unmeasurable victory.

Congrats Cam. You once were a monkey, and now you are Man. Boy. Man-Boy?

Now go eat some bananas. 

Evolution of monkey-mans

Disclaimer: This was not intended to be some sort of ridiculous politcal/social/religious/whatever debate firestarter. That's not what this blog is intended for. I don't care if you are for it or against it or believe in God or worship some all knowing purple swamp toad. If you have judgmental comments to make, go stick your head in a toilet and then proceed to announce them to someone else. SO not interested. 

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